SEASON 1996-97 Living in the past WEBMEISTER BREAKS NEW GROUND WITH UPDATED FOGG-HORN!

The Chairman's history of the "Where's The Head On That Pint Fantasy League"

A Considerable Double

Another August, another season. With plenty of interest from outsiders, the league was in a position to expand to yet another division during the summer of 1996. Nine new managers came on board, including two newcomers recruited by Barry Thompson in Saudi Arabia. Justine Thurman and Jon Ward joined with high expectations and were to become major forces in the lower divisions during the two seasons that followed. For the last time the Auctions were held at the Ashley Arms, which was subsequently refurbished and ruined as an auction venue.

There were a few changes among the regulars for the start of the season. With the return of Bristol Rovers to Bristol, two Superior Division managers opted for name changes reflecting this event. The Twerton Terrors became known as The Memorial Marauders, whilst Jon Pullin's Armchair Supporters XI now went under the name of The Pirates Return. The Chairman, meanwhile adopted an unusual auction strategy in order to rename his squad Emerson Blake & Palmer.

In the early stages of the season there were some predictable leaders. The Memorial Marauders and The Pirates Return soon established a lead in the Superior Division. They were to be accompanied for most of the season by Liversalts FC, Emerson Blake & Palmer and Rob Foster's Cotham Crusaders II. By the end of the season, however, Adrian Downs had further underlined his credentials as the Iron Fist, for the third successive campaign. The Memorial Marauders romped home to the title by a clear 57pts. It was a dispiriting time for everyone; would his domination ever come to an end? Down at the other end things became cut and dried pretty quickly. By the tenth week of the season the bottom three were a permanent fixture and Real Ale Madrid, Megans & Owens Clarets and Club International all fell through the trapdoor by the end of the season.

In the other two divisions matters were less certain. In the first week of the season, Harry &Charlie Sports failed to pick up a single point, and yet this was the team that were eventually to walk off with the Inferior Division title. Matt Wood's The Minus Touch made an early showing but fell away as the campaign progressed. Bruce Ellacott was to make up for the disappointment of the previous season, and narrowly missed out on the title, finishing as runners-up. Meanwhile, it was a season of fruitless struggle for the Two Foggs, Mark and Andy, as both Kievs slipped out of the league's second division, and also for Rais Hyder's Karachi Casuals, who also ended up in the drop zone. In the new Nursery Division Justine Thurman's Muttawas On Aceed were to totally dominate the season, finishing 80pts ahead of their nearest rivals. During the early stages of the season, the Nursery was a close affair, in fact it wasn't until Week 22 that Sporting Abaaya really featured in the hunt for promotion places. Jon Ward's team paced themselves perfectly and squeezed out Mancunian Jibbers for second place. Shaun Newport (Y Viva Italia!) failed to make it to the Auction and rarely got off the bottom of the table, thus emphasising the importance of turning up to the most important event of the fantasy football calendar.

This was also the season that The Memorial Marauders laid to rest the rumour that they are a league team only. In addition to their third successive title, they also grabbed the Caffrey's Chalice, to rub salt into everyone's wounds. It almost didn't happen, though. In the first round the Iron Fist had to scramble a 1-1 draw with Andy Gill's Foggy's Mate. They ground out a 4pts victory in the replay (-1:3). In the second round, though, it was business as usual as they thumped the league's other marauders, Macs Marauders, 15-2. Their next round fixture was to be one of the strangest ever in the cups. Drawn against Tim Clay's Washington Foreskins, they managed yet another draw, a very rare event in cup games. After a 15-15 draw in the first game, the teams met up again in a replay that eventually ended even again, this time 13-13. Finally penalties (flips of a coin) settled it, 4-2. If anything confirmed the jamminess of the Iron Fist, this round surely was it. In the semis, Mancunian Jibbers succumbed to the curse, 15-6, and in the final week of the season Kaputten Diesel Pumpen were swept aside, 20-13.

In The Roy Pearce Trophy it was to be Pat Maloney's year. For the second season running the Inferior champions picked up the league's premier cup. Tearing up their group for toilet paper, Harry & Charlie Sports won all six of their qualifying games in style. In the second round they were drawn against strugglers, Macs Marauders who they absolutely annihilated 22-1. The third round pitted them against The Pirates Return however, who were no pushovers, but who were toppled just the same, 26-8. Pat Maloney was bulldozing his way to the silverware. In a nervous semi-final, however, Pat only managed to shave a 1-0 win over Washington Foreskins. In a final that promised much action and a lot of points, Harry & Charlie Sports met Nursery trailblazers Muttawas On Aceed. The result was the highest scoring final so far in the history of the Trophy as Pat ran out the winner, 25-17. It wasn't as remarkable as a treble, but is was still a considerable double. The happiest manager in the league, however, was Trevor Cowles, who finally made it not just off the bottom, but also got promotion back to the top flight.